I want to start off by saying, this is not an overnight process and I am not in any way trying to make it sound easy. Up until last year, I was a completely different person, lacking confidence, feeling like the world was against me and angry at everyone and everything. Part of this was me being mentally unwell too, but another part was the me that had grown to be that person since 13 years old.
Since going through my own struggles of life, I’ve just come to the conclusion that life is so short yet can be so tough for a lot of us so why not be kind and supportive rather than self-centred (which I’ve been guilty of).
It can definitely feel like the world is against us when bad and horrible experiences happen to us, and even worse when we go on to social media to see everyone living their best and happy lives. But you must remember people choose what they show and don’t show of their lives on social media, and most choose not to show the sh** parts, just like you may do yourself.
Last year, I actually ended up speaking to different people whose lives came across as perfect on social media, yet these same people were going through so many of their own problems behind the scenes. This was the wake up call for me, not everyone is as open as I can be, and so it’s become important to me to try and reach out to those people through social media.
Up until last year, I spent a lot of my time believing that I was the only teenager whose life was far from perfect, constantly questioning ‘why me?’ whenever the tiniest of things didn’t go right and being stuck in my own bubble of life basically. This led to me also isolating myself from people around me in school.
When I realised that actually, it wasn’t JUST me whose life was far from perfect but many others too, and it wasn’t just me whose life consisted of some of the hardest and most painful experiences, I came to the conclusion that it was such a waste of energy to envy others and have a ‘woe is me’ attitude.
I’m not saying you need to ‘toughen up’, definitely not. I’m saying you can use your own experiences to help others in whichever way you choose, obviously not everyone is comfortable sharing the more private parts of their life with strangers which of course is okay. It can be as simple as being that little bit kinder to someone, because you know what it feels like to have people being rude when you’re already feeling like rubbish.
In fact one of the reasons, aside from having a passion for writing, that I’ve started and actually published this blog for anyone and everyone to see is to try and help others. We can ALL help each other in some way whether it’s through writing music, creating entertaining videos, whatever you enjoy and are good at, you can use to help at least one other person.
I think we all strive for these perfect lives that we see celebrities and people that we aspire to be, having when in reality, we’re only seeing what they choose to show us. It’s okay to strive for this kind of life, but it’s IMPORTANT to remember that it’s okay to not have a perfect life too.
What I’ve found that matters most are your intentions. Only you know if what you’re doing is coming from good or bad intentions (hopefully good!), and so let others think what they want to, I know myself that I’ve formed opinions on people or organisations that I actually had no clue about.
You could say that my thinking is naive, but it’s helped me to become a better person and actually think how other people would feel before I react or speak. I’m not perfect, and still have my days where I forget all about the above and go about the day thinking the world’s against me! But again, that’s okay, you’re never gonna get to a point in your life where you’re living ‘perfectly’ because we’re constantly making mistakes and growing from them. That’s what makes us human!
So be as kind as you can, and do as much as you can, you’ll feel MUCH better I promise.
Ciao for now x